


Deja Vu

by jimmoriartyisthebestboss



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M, POV Bucky Barnes, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Post-Captain America: The First Avenger, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Pre-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Reminiscing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-29
Updated: 2019-03-29
Packaged: 2019-12-26 10:31:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18281198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jimmoriartyisthebestboss/pseuds/jimmoriartyisthebestboss
Summary: When Bucky Barnes wakes up to find Steve Rogers missing from bed, he finds Steve comforting Wanda.





	Deja Vu

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> The title is taken from the song Deja Vu by Monsta X.
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy!

The bed is cold when Bucky wakes up to the sound of rain pounding against the window. His arm is outstretched to feel the other side of the bed and finds only thrown back sheets and the cold awaiting him. A part of him panics as he peels his eyes open and listens to the sound of the rain. What if someone has broken in? Why would they only take Steve though? What if this was just a dream? Bucky moves his metal arm, the new one that had been attached months earlier. It had taken some getting used to having this new arm. It was metal like his old one but the red star was gone from it. He had marveled at how when he first touched things such as the steel of the operating table and the mug on a counter. They felt as real as if he touched them with his other hand, his real arm.

Shivering, he slips from the bed and pulls on a pair of jeans and a shirt laying on the floor. A quick glance at the shirt tells him it is Steve’s from the day before and he smiles as he slips it on over his head. The room feels dead without Steve in it, as if Steve took all the warmth with him. For Bucky, life without Steve is a life without warmth.

Bucky slips out from behind the door and pads down the passageway of their apartment. T’Challa had set them up in his complex and gave them their own space. It had originally been a home only for Steve but as soon as they were able to take away the decades of brain washing, it had become Bucky’s’ home as well. He still had fleeting memories of those times and some nights he woke up and got sick in the bathroom across the hall. It would feel so real. Then he would feel Steve’s hand on his back and Steve’s touch would guide him back to safety.

Voices fill Bucky’s ears as he continues down the hallway into their living room. The light was on in the kitchen and Steve’s voice floats out to him. “…it’ll be okay.”

“I killed innocents. I…” A girl’s voice follows Steve’s and Bucky perks up at the sound of it. Wanda had become a frequent visitor to their apartment and had kept Steve company while they waited for a cure for Bucky. She saw the two older men not only as friends but as father figures and would ask for their advice on any matters that she was concerned with. Now she sounds broken and it in turn broke Bucky’s heart.

As quietly as Bucky can, he knocks on the doorframe and sticks his head in. “Everything okay?” Bucky asks. Wanda has her head down on the kitchen table and Steve is rubbing her back lightly.

Steve looks up when Bucky entered and Steve’s face lights up in a way that it only does when he see’s Bucky. “It’s fine. Come in.”

Bucky slips into the room and bends down next to Wanda. Bucky takes a hold of her shoulder and gives it a light squeeze. “If you hadn’t stopped them, they would have killed thousands. You did the best you could to save the maximum number of lives. We have to live with that burden.” Hauling himself up, Bucky goes over to the coffee maker and starts pulling down mugs. It was always Bucky who made the best coffee, and this felt as if it is a situation that needed it.

“If you’re worried about being perceived as cool in the public eye just follow the rules the best that you can. It’s all you can do.” Steve murmurs to her, loud enough for Bucky to hear.

A mug slams onto the counter and Wanda jumps, her face coming up tear stained and hair sticking to the tracks the tears had made across her face. “Steve Rogers you never followed a god damn rule in your life.”

Coffee had slopped over the side of the mug and Bucky picks up a towel to clean it. The chair Steve is sitting in squeaks as he leans back and crosses his arms over his chest. “Yes, I did.”

“Don’t give me that bull.” Bucky mutters as he throws the towel into the sink.

Wanda looks between the two men and curiosity got the better of her. “What did he do?” She asks.

There is a snort as Steve leans back farther in his chair and Bucky turns around. “Don’t break our chair.”

“I’m not going to!” Steve shots back and looks up at Bucky who comes to stand next to him and shoves the chair right. “Name one time I broke a rule.”

“How about all those times you got into fights in the back alleys in the 30’s?” The chair slams down as Bucky pushes on it and Steve catches onto the arm to keep from falling off. “You went around telling every guy off who opposed to the war or had different views from you thinking you could take them when you were this scrawny kid- “

“Hey!”

“Who had asthma and would get sick easily. Then I’d have to jump in and save your ass. Then when I had to leave you,” Bucky’s hands came down on Steve’s shoulders and Bucky leans his weight on them to look over Steve’s shoulders into Wanda’s eyes. “This little shit got himself enlisted in the war.”

Wanda’s eyes widen as she looks between them and a small smile breaks across her lips. “Did he do anything bad during the war?”

“Would you call defying a general bad?” An eyebrow raises and the seat goes flying back as Steve stands up. The legs slam into Bucky’s and Bucky stumbles backwards into the counter.

Steve is shaking, his hands clenched into fist at his side as he stares at Bucky. “I defied him to save you.”

“What if I had been dead Steve?” It felt like bombs falling in the room, the silence becomes deafening as they stare at each other.

“I would have known Buck. And if you were I would have brought you home.”

They stare at each other, across the chair now abandoned on the floor. A cleared throat reminds them of Wanda’s presence, and she peeks out around Steve’s body. “What did he do?”

Bucky eyes Steve as Bucky rights the chair that had fallen and sits down in it. Steve leans against the counter and looks at the floor, his mind somewhere else. “Steve came to the front lines. He wasn’t supposed to but he was meant to be a moral support for the troops. They saw him as a joke, who was this guy to tell them about war when he wasn’t fighting?”

A quick glance in Steve’s direction and Bucky continues. “My unit, the 107th, were captured by the Nazi’s. Used for torture and to try to replicate the super soldier serum that was used on Steve. I was the experiment but they couldn’t get it to work or so they thought. So, they tried torture. I did what was I was told in basic training, only repeating my name and dog tag number and where I was from.”

“It was all a bit of a blur for me but Steve was at the camp. A general was talking about a unit of men who had been kidnapped and presumed dead. Steve knew that unit number as mine and demanded we be found and brought back. The general told him no, that he was to stay put and that we were probably dead. He’s a stubborn ass when he wants to be and with Howard Stark- “

“Tony’s dad?” Wanda looks between Steve and Bucky. “You knew Tony’s dad?”

“He built my shield.” Steve says quietly.

“Anyways. Howard Stark and Peggy Carter helped Steve parachute close enough to the camp and come save us. I don’t remember much about that day but I remember him. Hearing his voice and then seeing this,” Bucky waves his hand at Steve’s body, “standing before me. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw him. He was even taller than me!” Bucky laughs and shakes his head. “He saved my life but defied a general’s orders. That’s how he was during the war, always doing what he wanted to do and never listening to authority.”

Wanda snorts and wipes at her eyes. The frown that had been on her lips disappears into a bemused smile as she watches Bucky look at Steve. The amount of love in that one stare is enough to kill all the world’s hate. “What did you think?”

“Of what?”

“When hunky super soldier showed up?”

“I am not hunky!” Steve protests but he starts to smile too.

Bucky thinks for a moment and then smiles. “I thought ‘God help me, I’m in love with him.’”

A look passes between Steve and Bucky and they both laugh. The tension has left Steve’s body and Bucky leans on the kitchen table. “But also ‘I’m going to jump him as soon as we are alone.’ “

“And that’s my cue to leave.” The chair scrapes back as Wanda stands up and laughs as they both protest. “You two need to be alone.” She leans down and presses a kiss to Bucky’s cheek and allows herself to be wrapped into a hug by Steve.

They wait till they heard the door close behind her before they speak again. “Did you really think that?” Steve asks, his voice husky.

“Of course, I did.” Bucky stands up and starts to clear away the mugs, the coffee now cold and not worth drinking. “The thoughts though were a lot dirtier. I made them PG for her.”

Steve slips in past Bucky, placing the mugs in the sink and turning back around to Bucky. “Care to share?”

Bucky laughs as he leans in and kisses Steve lightly. “All in due time.”


End file.
